Being Known
I never really noticed how predictable my routine has become until other people started knowing it better than i do sometimes, there are certain days and certain times when i’m usually at the church or convent, and apparently i’ve been doing the same things consistently enough that people actually notice when something changes.
If i’m later than usual, somebody will usually ask if everything is alright, if i arrive much earlier, someone asks what i’m usually reading this time, as i take the early time to read. Father somehow remembers which days i have physical therapy and can usually tell when i’m more tired afterward, and there have been a few times where he’s asked how something went that i had completely forgotten mentioning to him in the first place. I’m starting to think priests have an unreasonable amount of storage space in their brains for everybody else’s schedules
it happens at the convent too, they know roughly when i tend to appear, what days i’m usually busy, when i can stay longer and when i normally have to leave. Sometimes there’s already something they thought i could help with because they knew i would probably be there anyway, even when i go to one of the other churches within the parish, i’m not really an unfamiliar person anymore. Someone knows my name, or they already know i’m coming, or Father has apparently mentioned that i’ll be there before i have even arrived
I don't think i expected any of this when i first started spending so much time around the Church. For a long time i still thought of myself as someone who was visiting, even after i had been going regularly for months and a few years now, at some point that apparently changed without me noticing
The good part is how much that means to me, being expected somewhere is such a small thing that i never really thought about it before. It’s different from simply being allowed to be somewhere, someone noticing that you’re twenty minutes late means they had already assumed you would walk through the door twenty minutes earlier, someone asking why you weren’t there means your absence actually changed something they expected about their day.
A rare few times i’ve been sick and stayed home completely, and somebody has messaged to ask whether everything is alright
I think i spent so long assuming that my presence and absence were basically interchangeable to most people that i never expected to have a routine other people would learn. Now there are people who can apparently tell something is slightly wrong just because i showed up at the wrong hour.
Maybe that’s one of the more ordinary things i’ve learned this year. Community isn't always somebody making a grand statement about caring for you but sometimes it’s walking into a building and hearing, "You’re late, is everything alright?" because somebody had already been waiting for you to arrive.
I never thought i would have that, but i’m very happy and grateful that i do.